My father was not a self-help guru or a psychologist, but looking back, I realize how many of my deepest values were shaped by watching him navigate joy, grief, uncertainty.
I did have a relationship with my father. It was a challenging one growing up. My dad had a model of a neighbor where the whole family followed through on whatever the dad wanted - in this case a family business - so the result, in my dad's eyes, was happiness. So he tried to create that with us. But we resisted following the plan and hence were not happy following it. There were to do lists we dreaded to see. My dad was very good at providing for us even when having some gaps in his career. To the end of his life he was committed to learning and I think that is a good thing. Towards the end of his life he told me all the things I was longing to hear growing up and I am very grateful for that !! Since he was very focused on providing while we were growing up he didn't always have a lot of energy for us which included being very involved in what was important to us. I'm glad we were able to be healed later in life. One thing I remember reading in a paper that I thought was helpful was that someone's father had said to them "if it can be fixed with money it's not a problem" I like that.
My (also Czech) father gave me optimism and hope. He was very happy-go-lucky.
Thank you for sharing, Dominika!
I did have a relationship with my father. It was a challenging one growing up. My dad had a model of a neighbor where the whole family followed through on whatever the dad wanted - in this case a family business - so the result, in my dad's eyes, was happiness. So he tried to create that with us. But we resisted following the plan and hence were not happy following it. There were to do lists we dreaded to see. My dad was very good at providing for us even when having some gaps in his career. To the end of his life he was committed to learning and I think that is a good thing. Towards the end of his life he told me all the things I was longing to hear growing up and I am very grateful for that !! Since he was very focused on providing while we were growing up he didn't always have a lot of energy for us which included being very involved in what was important to us. I'm glad we were able to be healed later in life. One thing I remember reading in a paper that I thought was helpful was that someone's father had said to them "if it can be fixed with money it's not a problem" I like that.
Love this Robin, so glad you eventually received what you needed from your father. And love the father advice you share. Sending much love!